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Retarded Mom

@IsRetardedMom

Am I really that Retarded?

Daughter's Boyfriend: “I named my dog after you” My Daughter: ‘Aww because it’s cute.’ Daughter's Boyfriend: “No, because it’s a bitch.”


My daughter's bf is very kind. When i yelled at him for taking my daughter's virginity, he apologized, saying "It won't happen again."


My daughter said, Once you go black, you never go back. But there are lots of beautiful colorful dresses, also!


I overheard my daughter's bf telling her he wants to "hit that". I should talk to her about domestic violence.


My husband is too generous. He wants to give pearl necklaces to all the ladies in his office!


My son gave me some veggies to add to the brownies. They were green and sticky, and very strong smelling. I'm glad he likes his vegetables


Whenever my daughter's bf sleeps over, i hear her moaning all night. She must be having nightmares! :(


My son and his gf are so considerate. I found them in the backseat of my car at 2am last night cleaning my car. The leather looks so shiny


Kristen Cavallari is showing a baby bump! Check out these photos. #6 is my favorite goo.gl/JEG6x - sp


My son's black friend asked if my husband was getting the job done in the bedroom. How did he know we were repainting it?


I wonder if that bitch, ever moved out of Ludacris's way?


I'm worried about my daughter. She often goes to her new boyfriend's house to watch him spank his monkey. Animal cruelty is not good!


My son is suddenly into mexican food. He is always going to his girlfriend's to have some pink tacos.


My son's friends must need some water. They're always licking their lips when I walk into the room.


My husband is going to be home late tonight. He works in construction and said he had to drop off a load at his secretary's place.


My stepson is so nice. He's always waiting with a towel when i get out of the shower!


I thought I caught my son masturbating! Then he explained he was doing his Human Sexuality homework for school! Whew!


I'm so happy for my son, he finally got a girlfriend! Her name is Mary Jane and he says that she lights up his world.


Oh jeez, these kids. I need a drink! Support me with an occasional click, please. goo.gl/AxoQh


My daughter needs to learn to chew her food. When she and her bf are watching movies in her room, I can hear her choking.


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