ItsRobbAllen's profile picture. A tittynope of joy

Robb Allen

@ItsRobbAllen

A tittynope of joy

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My latest song, "No Thought for the Morrow", is out now on most streaming platforms. Please share with your friends! music.youtube.com/watch?v=PfgVSM…


Still need to get a better OWB holster, especially something with a bit of retention, but this served me well today

ItsRobbAllen's tweet image. Still need to get a better OWB holster, especially something with a bit of retention, but this served me well today

Just open carried to Publix. First time OC'ing here in FL being that they struck down the law against it as unconstitutional. The lady who sliced my bread gave it a glance, and that was the most interaction I had. If anyone else noticed, nobody said anything. The elderly lady…


Wait.... Y'all can't smell ants?


I like how my Kindle is advertising the book I am currently reading. I now get the joke behind "Am I the cute one? " @monsterhunter45

ItsRobbAllen's tweet image. I like how my Kindle is advertising the book I am currently reading. 

I now get the joke behind "Am I the cute one? " @monsterhunter45

Three quarters of a million people. 16 years of being on this platform and this somehow is my banger. *shrug* Back to fart jokes & obscurity.

ItsRobbAllen's tweet image. Three quarters of a million people. 

16 years of being on this platform and this somehow is my banger. 

*shrug*

Back to fart jokes & obscurity.

Aw man, and I used to LOVE his books ;)

Coffee is just dirty bean water. Smells great. Tastes like dirt. There's a reason you dump so much sweet filler in.



Their wailing is music to my ears. Their gnashing of teeth, a steady rhythm to keep the beat.

Customers May Openly Carry Firearms in Florida’s Publix Stores, Company Says nytimes.com/2025/10/09/us/… Seriously, who wants to encounter a gun-toting nutcase in the produce department? This is the result of the Supreme Court ignoring the Second Amendment's conditional clause.



My answer: Several I was forced to take ALGEBRA. I was an aviation electrician who had taken calculus in HS, but they were like "Nah bro, you gotta take the intro to addition class" Rarely showed up, aced the tests.

I’ll occasionally see people talk about how they had college course they passed and yet only had to show up to class for major exams and such. (Not an online course) In other words, they did not attend most class sessions and still passed. Did you have a class like this?



Remember, it could always be worse & you could have to work with me.

ItsRobbAllen's tweet image. Remember, it could always be worse & you could have to work with me.

Absolutely horrible. Add these people & their families into your prayers.

TAKE A LOOK AT THIS: Helicopter video shows what's left of Accurate Energetic Systems in Hickman County, Tennessee that experienced an explosion Friday morning. At least 19 people are unaccounted for. (Video: WTVF Nashville) t.ly/V3X0Z



Remember the magic words "Wow. Just like your mother"

I’m getting married in seven days. Reply with horrendous marriage advice.



My youngest started collecting Monster High dolls when she was very young & still has quite the collection of them. I am hoping she decides to buy this one, because... they understood the assignment. instagram.com/p/DPoab7pjRQ_/…

instagram.com

Monster High (@monsterhigh) • Instagram photos and videos

Monster High (@monsterhigh) • Instagram photos and videos


"So you bought a new Jeep?" "Yes" "And the payments are a bit higher than you thought you could handle?" "Yeah" "And you say you can still see your dashboard?"

ItsRobbAllen's tweet image. "So you bought a new Jeep?"

"Yes"

"And the payments are a bit higher than you thought you could handle?"

"Yeah"

"And you say you can still see your dashboard?"

Here I am, stuck between the zenith & nadir.


Client: "We tried to go live with this, but it's completely wrong" [Me, staring at the code that has been that way for OVER A FULL YEAR where they swore they were testing]: ...


No need to tag me on this one.

You've heard of Anatidaephobia, the fear that a duck is watching you. You may not have heard of Anatidaephilia, that is, people who LIKE IT when a duck watches. That's what the duck chair in bedrooms is for.

RocketPulpHack's tweet image. You've heard of Anatidaephobia, the fear that a duck is watching you.

You may not have heard of Anatidaephilia, that is, people who LIKE IT when a duck watches.

That's what the duck chair in bedrooms is for.
RocketPulpHack's tweet image. You've heard of Anatidaephobia, the fear that a duck is watching you.

You may not have heard of Anatidaephilia, that is, people who LIKE IT when a duck watches.

That's what the duck chair in bedrooms is for.


It's the throwaway jokes that seem to do the numbers

ItsRobbAllen's tweet image. It's the throwaway jokes that seem to do the numbers

"So, you were at a strip club?" "Yeah" "And the stripper said she liked you?" "Uh huh" "So you married her?" "Yeah, I did"

ItsRobbAllen's tweet image. "So, you were at a strip club?"

"Yeah"

"And the stripper said she liked you?"

"Uh huh"

"So you married her?"

"Yeah, I did"

"So, you're a Lance Corporal?" "Yes, Dave" "And you wanted a new truck?" "Yeah" "And the only way to get it was at 18.5% interest?" "Uh huh" "And you went ahead and signed?"

ItsRobbAllen's tweet image. "So, you're a Lance Corporal?"

"Yes, Dave"

"And you wanted a new truck?"

"Yeah"

"And the only way to get it was at 18.5% interest?"

"Uh huh"

"And you went ahead and signed?"

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