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Walking through the office Valentine’s Day party to the back of the kitchen to grab a can opener for my can of tuna (22g protein) with an intense sense of superiority
Breaking: Chicken breast has been cut from the team, and will be replaced by chicken thigh. Chicken thigh will also be replacing salmon in the starting lineup.
People are going all out for Halloween this year. I just passed a guy laying down on the sidewalk dressed as a hobo
Sorry babe, I can’t go to sweet green right now. I’m interacting with push ads from Moncler.
Office catered burgers and fries while I’m on a cut. Just ordered a salad. A weaker man would have folded. I am not weak. I am strong. And I am vain. And I am still above 10% body fat. Blinded to the spoils of excess of this earth by the singular mission.
CONFIRMED: The apartment gym remains the Mecca of bad form and worse outfits
10 months after moving from LA to Miami, I just saw on Instagram that it’s Coachella weekend and didn’t hear a word about it until right now. More firm confirmation that moving was the right choice.
Employee at Vale: The braised beef is $2 extra. Is that okay? Translated: Are you poor and low T?
unfortunately for my haters i will once again be living my best life this weekend
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