Oh you got “Swag”? I bet that looks great on your application to McDonald’s.
"HEY CAN I HAVE A SIP?" "sure..." GULP GULP GULP. "DUDE WTF?"
When you're choking on something and everybody just stares at you instead of helping..
Does anyonelse's heart drop when your parents ask to see your phone?
Dear Parents, Thanks for passing by the TV at the most awkward and inappropriate moment of the movie. Sincerely, Uncomfortable...
#ThingsICareAbout Food. No one touches my food. No one.
Me: If you were on a bus full of gay guys would you get off? Friend: Yes.....Shit.
I hate when you make one little mistake and the whole world is mad at you
I don't hate people, I just feel better when some of them aren't around.
"Can I see your phone?" "Uhh one second..." *Delete Delete Delete* "Here you go."
#boysshould never, under any circumstance make their own sandwich. never.
#WhiteKidProblems Wheres my iPhone?!? #BlackKidProblems How do I unlock the iPhone I just stole!?
I use my phone as a flashlight and hit random buttons to keep it lit.
That awkward moment, when you run in the closet, and you don't end up in Narnia...
Admit it, once in your life, you've tried to guess someones password and failed.
Saying a word over and over again until it doesn't sound normal anymore.
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