Rod Hernandez
@RodrigoToGo
best collection of stolen jokes and occasional observations
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Live band entrances always, always, always, ALWAYS TAKES AWAY from a wrestlers entrance. #WrestleMania #wwe #cmpunk
That #nfl halftime show was garbage. -#Usher #Halftime #SuperBowl
So, people asking for money at intersections are now taking #zelle.
Today I learned that if you get to an #innout drive through window without having a chance to order, it’s called a “home run”.
How does #KanyeWest tie his #YEEZYs? In little #nazis. (He’s an idiot). #joke #jokeoftheday #FridayVibes #Friday #jokes
I think I saw Michael J Fox in the garden section at Home Depot. I can’t be sure though as he had his back to the fuchsias. #joke #jokeoftheday #dadjoke #Tuesday #funny #laugh
To the person waiting in their car, pressuring me to take my parking space because it’s near the entrance: we’re at the #gym. You can walk! #gymlife #smh #mondaythoughts #MondayMotivation
I hope everybody goes home and hugs their guns a little tighter tonight.
My friend is a successful sculptor. He made over six figures last year. #joke #jokeoftheday #dadjoke #dadjokes #funny #SaturdayVibes #saturday
How many of you are already sick of Gable Steveson? #wwe #WrestleMania #WrestleMania38
My 76-year old dad didn’t like the #HalfTimeShow because he doesn’t like “new” music. #SuperBowl #SuperBowlLVI #SuperBowlHalftimeShow #nbcsports #nfl #football #RamsHouse #Bengals
What do you call quesadillas you eat for breakfast? Buenosdillas. #joke #jokeoftheday #dadjokes #dadjoke #funny
What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 1080p? HDMI. #joke #jokeoftheday #starwars #TheBookOfBobaFett #dadjoke
Dear @TonyKhan, hurry up and let’s get a show out here in L.A. That is all. Thank you.
A homeless lady just asked me for money. When I told her I didn’t have cash (which I didn’t), she replied , “It’s ok honey. I have #Zelle.” #SundayMorning #sunday #breakfasttime
Two limbo players walk into a bar. They lost. #joke #jokes #jokeoftheday #dadjoke #dadjokes #funny #laugh #sundayvibes
My neighbor told me he was scared to grow an apple tree. I told him to grow a pear. #joke #jokeoftheday #dadjokes #dadjoke #funny #laugh #jokes
You would think that a snail without its shell would move faster- but it’s more sluggish. #joke #jokeoftheday #laugh #dadjoke #sundayvibes #sunday
I hear that in the Bill and Melinda Gates divorce Melinda will get to keep the house - but Bill will keep the Windows. #joke #jokeoftheday #funny #dadjoke #microsoft #humpday
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