New Dad Tips
@SomeNewDadTips
The not-so-obvious lessons for first-time fathers. (We mess things up, so you don't have to.)
Happy or unhappy with your new baby's hair (color/style/amount)? Don't get too invested in that opinion -- it's going to change. A lot.
Tip 8: Vaseline on the butt (like a bead of silicone), before putting on a new diaper. TRUST US ON THIS ONE.
Tip 7: If you see an opportunity to catch a nap while the baby does, take it. If your S.O. has that opportunity, give it to her FIRST.
Tip 6: Twenty percent of babies' cries are for nothing more than some attention. (The real trick is learning which are the other eighty.)
BONUS TIP: Humming the main theme from #StarWars in a low register is seriously comforting to newborns. (Hey! Your own actual padawan.)
Tip 5: As tiring as it is, she has it ten times worse, pal. Buckle down, and make anything you can easier for her.
Tip 4: Learn to eat on your feet. (Pro Tip Edition: Practice one-handed.)
Tip 3: If they say to stay behind the screen during a c-section, DO IT. You're gonna be a big obstacle to the surgeons lying on the floor.
Tip 2: If a nurse or doctor offers to demonstrate something for you, let them. Even if you think you know it. You're gonna learn something.
Tip 1: You're going to get a metric crap-ton of conflicting advice. Smile, thank them, and prepare to ignore 90% of it.
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