__jodieb's profile picture. poet, philosopher, failure ~ she/her

jodie

@__jodieb

poet, philosopher, failure ~ she/her

trying to get my absolutely steaming drunk Aussie bf to drink water and he said I’m not having a Pom tell me what to do. Can’t argue w that actually x


I wish I could express emotion normally instead of being like hi I spent 2 hours making you this Lego platypus, would you like to keep hanging out with me for the foreseeable future?


I get it and I appreciate the sentiment but people need to stop buying me 100 Yorkshire tea bags as a novelty gift, I’m literally going to be buried in tea at this rate x


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every city is a walkable city if you’ve got big strong beefy legs and an indomitable human spirit like me. also broke and car-less


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Not to be dramatic but it happens 12 hours after you turn 25

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I’ve started describing myself as doing Australia on hard mode because I can’t swim and I can’t drive x


Changed my age preferences on hinge and most of my likes are from men in their early 20s? I’ve not dated a 22 year old since I was a teenager


I cannot imagine the sheer amount of cocaine that will be flying about

“This is it, this is happening” Tickets on sale this Saturday 31st August (🇮🇪8AM IST / 🇬🇧9AM BST) Dates: Cardiff Principality Stadium - 4th/5th July Manchester Heaton Park - 11th/12th/19th/20th July London Wembley Stadium - 25th/26th July & 2nd/3rd August Edinburgh Scottish Gas…



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Senior Conservative Jacob Rees-Mogg loses North East Somerset and Hanham seat to Labour #BBCElection live ⬇️


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Nobody: My Glade Air Freshener at 3am:


This is too real

“This is it, this is happening” Tickets on sale this Saturday 31st August (🇮🇪8AM IST / 🇬🇧9AM BST) Dates: Cardiff Principality Stadium - 4th/5th July Manchester Heaton Park - 11th/12th/19th/20th July London Wembley Stadium - 25th/26th July & 2nd/3rd August Edinburgh Scottish Gas…



I think I’ve done it, I think I’ve become the hipster final boss, I’m a barista in a coffee shop on time out’s coolest street in the world


I cannot stop singing I’m looking for a man in finance, trust fund, 6’5, blue eyes when that is in fact the exact OPPOSITE of what I’m looking for


Australian men are FOUL a wristy?? a gobby???


‘I don’t need to work, I’m from old money’ and then ‘homeless people are lazy and lack drive’ in the same breath!!! 😭💀

“This is it, this is happening” Tickets on sale this Saturday 31st August (🇮🇪8AM IST / 🇬🇧9AM BST) Dates: Cardiff Principality Stadium - 4th/5th July Manchester Heaton Park - 11th/12th/19th/20th July London Wembley Stadium - 25th/26th July & 2nd/3rd August Edinburgh Scottish Gas…



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northstardoll's tweet image.

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Super Hans: 'Course I have. The twins. The fuckin' twins! I'm always on about them. I bloody love them two. Here, I've got 'em on me phone. Oh, hold on, have I? Ah, I'll never forgive Orange if they've wiped the twins! Oh that is, that is shitty. Where are the bloody twins?

PeepScript's tweet image. Super Hans: 'Course I have. The twins. The fuckin' twins! I'm always on about them. I bloody love them two. Here, I've got 'em on me phone. Oh, hold on, have I? Ah, I'll never forgive Orange if they've wiped the twins! Oh that is, that is shitty. Where are the bloody twins?

I think I have been very brave to try on 8 pairs of jeans, all of which were too small and not burst into tears


United States Tendenze

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