Kayditty
@_kayditty
A picture may paint a thousand words but I can use my words to paint a thousand pictures.
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Once you’re over 50 you’re gonna compare medical conditions at social gatherings. Don’t fight it. It’s gonna happen.
You know you’re getting old when you stash pairs of glasses throughout the house to see well enough to find your main pair of specs. (Unless it’s just me.)
The problem with reality is that it gets real way too often.
No Spanx for me. I prefer not to feel like a tube of a Pilsbury Crescent Rolls when I undress.
Spend as much effort remembering the kindnesses from others as you do the misdeeds and your world will change.
The fact that some of you guys want to be social with me on this social media app makes me question your judgment.
Anyone else get hammered last night and lose track of how much pudding they ate? No?
If Facebook has taught me anything it’s that there is a reason we lose touch with people.
If you don't want me to reply to your tweets, get the fuck off of Twitter.
What mens’ dating profiles say: No crazy chicks What mens’ FB profiles show: In a relationship with a crazy chick
You’re excited about that Amazon gift card, but deep down you know it’ll be spent on dog poop bags, a toilet plunger, chip clips and Tums.
I’ve got some goodies* for ya under my shirt. *peanut m&ms I dropped
If you burn all your bridges don’t be surprised when you find yourself alone on an island.
If life has knocked you on your ass dozens of times, you’re not a victim. You’re a fucking warrior because you’ve gotten back up every time.
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