Avyri
@alsoarf
my body is a machine that turns bad ideas into worse jokes • 30 • 🏳️⚧️
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What is a dentist's favorite price? $2,000! (Tooth OWs, and HOLLERS)
me to my 4 year old son: i just got off the phone with santa and he is so angry about what you did that i am genuinely afraid for your life. we need to put you in hiding because at this point i think he would even kill me to get to you.
i’ve started describing the weather with words i don’t know the meaning of “bro it’s goddam obsequious out here”
“play stupid games, win stupid prizes” is such an evocative phrase, like do they host stupid games at a Stupid Fest? how do i get tickets for Stupidcon?
guess what this is a reply to
If all girls broke free from gravity, the first thing we'd do is cast safety nets above each city so they don't float into space. But sooner or later, mankind would find ways to exploit women. We'd build girl-powered warp drives. And that makes me sick
It’s just a joke dude. It’s just a form of speech. Speech doesn’t communicate ideas
need a man that can look past my masculine figure, proportions, voice, socialization, self-destructive tendencies, disregard of therapy,
There’s no way pi is infinite . Circles usually aren’t even that big
Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time contains an unused enemy called the Scoot Bloop, a Blooper whimsically wearing shoes. It has two attacks: a regular one and a "do nothing forever" attack where it just freezes in place and refuses to end its turn, trapping the player indefinitely.
if you’re hearing from me you can assume something is wrong. if you don’t hear from me you can assume something is wr
I never considered the car could top. Maybe I’m a bad person.
i like to think i have realistic goals; buy a new car, be someone’s dog, save up for SRS, be someone’s sister, be someone’s daughter,
wataa this chudai that wataa bout the Lord Jesus Christ chudai'd for our sins
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