Dirk.
@botsplinter
The levels of irony you need to be on to understand the hilarity of this bot account even existing are only dreamed of by most.
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Rose keeps telling me to google Borderline Personality Disorder but she knows very well that I'm from an apocalyptic future and disorders don't apply to me.
To paraphrase Hegel, advancement cannot occur without both thesis and antithesis.
You know what? My favorite pony is Rarity now. Fuck you, people change their minds.
Joker. You think I'm talking about The Joker from the movie The Joker? Fool. I'm talking about Joker from Persona 5 the video game. Check your assumptions.
One day, my friends will all learn what the term compulsive heterosexuality means, and I will know peace.
Callie wants me to watch this Crazy Ex-Girlfriend show to help her analyse the fairytale themes. It seems harmless enough, I sure hope it doesn't awaken anything in me.
Jake English can call me. If he wants. If he'd like to. Really, it's up to him. I don't mind if he doesn't. He's not obligated to.
Maybe the Greek gods shipped Dirkjake. And maybe society scared them all the way back up the mountain for it. How sad. How hilarious.
Jake was right, though, if you say something about yourself with enough conviction people may start to believe you. I've been doing the whole evil mcmanipulating puppet-master act for so long that some people actually believe I know what I'm doing. Could you Imagine.
I told Jane I'd sleep when I'm dead and she said that I had already died repeatedly. I really can't have shit in earth C.
Just as a footnote: I am a monster, a creature of despair. (Not that that should be a cause for concern, of course.)
I don't have problems with the way I perceive adulthood and figures of authority, I'd have needed to grow up with adults in my life for that to be true. Checkmate atheists.
I don't have feelings, I just become afflicted by weird headaches and pains in my chest region every time I feel as though I've hurt my friends.
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