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i cry when cutting onions because i trusted the onion and didnt want it to end like this
why i oughta *charges into cartoon fight cloud* *the dust settles and i come out pregnant*
(after my card declines) Strange. That account has 1 million dollars in it
overheard my wife tell our cat to “go find something to do”
Dodgers fans after the Dodgers signs Edwin Diaz and Kyle Tucker in the offseason
I used to fear the black mold in my apartment bathroom but now I understand it. It’s here to help me. It’s here to make me feel good.
asked my husband to make me a pb&j he’s been gone for 20 minutes i hear chopping wtf is he doing
no more going sicko mode around my abuelito bro i’m being serious
We are the granddaughters of the grandmas you couldn’t run over with reindeers
[while my wife opens up her christmas present] remember when you said we needed milk
they’re bluffing when they say you can still get knocked off the nice list this late in the game. santa’s been delivering gifts in japan for hours by now; that list is locked, do whatever you want.
has anyone noticed what its beginning to look a lot like
bakery drake: you used to butter all my fresh scones
United States Trends
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- 7. Fable N/A
- 8. WE BELONG TOGETHER N/A
- 9. Sinners N/A
- 10. Maki N/A
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- 12. He-Man N/A
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- 14. #BTS_ARIRANG N/A
- 15. Trinity Rodman N/A
- 16. #YIAYhouse N/A
- 17. Hanoi Jane N/A
- 18. JUNGKOOKS N/A
- 19. Titanic N/A
- 20. Massie N/A
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