Helpful Tips
@helpfulinsight
#sarcasm These are just life tips #sarcasm
*duck walks into a bread factory* alright everybody put your FUCKING hands up
sir, your resume just says that you were banned from club penguin in 2003 and well we would just like to know when you can start
People who enjoy running- do you also enjoy getting stung by bees or something that everyone else in the world hates
Sorry for all the rts. But in my defense, my own tweets are garbage.
If you call me bae I'll probably throw myself off of the Empire State Building.
#lifetip if you feel fat, put the donut down.... And pick up a cake and EAT THAT SHIT BITCH
*leaves room where baby is screaming* Your kid sucks at karate
Just remembered there is pizza in the fridge. Haven't been this happy since 2003.
Bro tip: give your girlfriend some scissors, say "bae blades" then prepare for the pussypocalypse
#lifetip therapists are helpful when you have mental health problems
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