jakey bake
@parttimewinner
some of this is real | he/him/y’all
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I heard Swifties are practically a new religion, I didn’t believe it until I went to a wedding where the entire bridal party mentioned Taylor in their speeches. Also they ritually sacrificed some kid on some huge shrine dedicated to the big Swift herself during the reception.
Kawhi Leonard? The environmental philanthropist?
bards when you cast haste on them and they just double down on trying to rizz up the dragon mid combat
Me: these 9 Sapporos ain’t shit Me, 37 minutes later:
Zohran: New York should be affordable for everyone Cuomo: A single mother is homeless because your rent is too low Eric Adams: Deep down, I think I must be little bit Dominican
Deep down, I think I must be little bit Dominican because marching down 6 Avenue in the Dominican Day Parade just felt like coming home! Every time I meet Dominican New Yorkers, I’m inspired by their generosity and energized by their passion. ¡Que viva el pueblo dominicano!
I keep seeing ragebait posts about people on food stamps bro every missile in the iron dome costs 200 grand and we pay for them all I don't care if some chick with 6 kids bought name brand cheerios
They tried to sell off America's wilderness and the animal which embodies the nation literally killed itself inside of earth's gleaming iridescent eye. Terrible omen, millions must be sacrificed in the boiling waters of Norris Geyser Basin to atone for this blasphemy
Bison boils to death in Yellowstone hot spring in front of tourists trib.al/DV2z8XP
Tiger Woulds
missed generational wealth again
Nintendo can get around the tariffs by using floating claw machines just outside US waters You can take a boat and pay $450 for unlimited attempts to win a Switch 2 from a claw machine If you win, it counts as “personal treasure,” exempt from tariffs under maritime salvage laws
The cinephile I want to be vs. the cinephile I actually am
The government is banning TikTok because dudes are rocking too hard on that platform, and they’re trying to silence our brothers
new screenshot to guilt your friends with just dropped
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