#dbaproblems search results
Replace "throw paper to toilet" w/ "use 40 LEFT OUTER JOINs in a query" #DBAproblems #Sochi2014 #SQL
Off topic but this is on living life fully, & I just got blood that makes me feel alive #DBAProblems #fireworkpeople

When you already made plans for the weekend and work unexpectedly requires you to be in the office 😂 #dbaproblems

"Oh gosh noooo, this query has a LIKE string comparison in it :(" - me #dbaproblems
No worries—app configures database. #FiveWordTechHorrors #dbaProblems
Finally going to bed at 4:30am after outage resolved. Ahhh...the life of a DBA. #dbaproblems
When I use SQL Server as a calculator because I’m too lazy to actually open calculator. #dbaproblems
Nothing like getting f'ed in the ass by an unexpected replication reinitialization... #DBAProblems
Production issues stopped me from getting out my #tsql2sday post. #dbaproblems
Sometimes, I give up on deciding between "run" and "ran" and just use "execute". #sqlserver #dbaproblems
Im a lot out of it still, so im gonna get a #lunchable and hopefully sleep. #spoonProbs #DBAProblems #fireworkpeople
OH: "I will just put the [upload] file in the folder, so ... any time you want to dump, you can just dump!" #DBAProblems
44. If you eat a lot: having friends with lots of leftover DBA. If you don't: having friends who do. #stuffdartmouthkidslike #dbaproblems
Ended up deleting one of the servers but thank God I had a backup.. went ahead and clone my backup .. now back in business #dbaproblems
ORA-12154: TNS can't resolve your connect identifier? We’ve got the fix! 🛠 Check out our guide to troubleshoot this classic Oracle error—no more head-scratching needed! #DBAproblems #OracleErrors #TechFix solvaria.com/understanding-…
🔍 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞𝐬? Learn how to tackle the 6 most common problems and optimize your system for peak efficiency! 🚀 #databaseperformanceissues #dbperformanceissues #dbaproblems tinyurl.com/3uek9sw9

Just tried sharding my MySQL database before tuning any queries. Because why fix problems when you can multiply them? 😂 #DBAProblems #MySQL #MySQLTips #SQLTips #Humour
Just added my 100th index on the same column in PostgreSQL because, you know, I like my queries like I like my coffee: extremely fast and slightly overdone. ☕💨 #OverIndexing #DBAProblems #Geek #Humour #MinervaDB #ChistaDATA #PostgreSQL
Ended up deleting one of the servers but thank God I had a backup.. went ahead and clone my backup .. now back in business #dbaproblems
Damn why I think my server crashed yesterday … all because I logged in with my guest wifi instead of my main Wi-Fi.. #dbaproblems
#dbaproblems can't decide if this is worse than "this query isn't working right <just_the_query> I need this this afternoon, let me know after I get back from lunch."
Please allow me to describe the query I’m having a problem with in intricate detail rather than post the query I’m having a problem with 🪄
What are some of your pet peeves that you come across when working with inherited database designs. I'll go first: Inconsistent naming conventions & Identity columns just named ID #sqlserver #dbaproblems #petpeeves
I hate everything that I know about him, which at this stage is just his name. #dbaproblems #dedupe geelongcats.com.au/news/851396/sc…
On-call during vacation, they say? #lego #programmingproblems #dbaproblems #ithumor #oncall #computerscience #databasehumor

When a P1 database issue comes up and the whole team comes over and looks at EVERYTHING you do on screen with the hopes of you fixing it with magic. #dbaproblems #dba #lego #itproblems #programmingproblems #database #computerscience #ithumor

When a P1 database issue comes up and the whole team comes over and looks at EVERYTHING you do on screen with the hopes of you fixing it with magic. #dbaproblems #dba #lego#itproblems #programmingproblems… instagram.com/p/B2Rn-SpFRhA/…
Sometimes, I give up on deciding between "run" and "ran" and just use "execute". #sqlserver #dbaproblems
When your supposedly 30-minute meeting with your manager turned into a 1 1/2 hour meeting instead. #dbaproblems #programmingproblems

Just twigged that Adelaide's Will Hamill is the second of that name in the AFL, there was a Lion with that name who played in 2007. Bugger! #dbaproblems
Two listed AFL players called Bailey Williams is bad enough, but there is also now a second Callum Brown. And the other one is an Irishman, so his Gaelic name is probably Cuidlguwlghioeyf and they could have used that instead. #shakesfist #dbaproblems
This is why I write T-SQL. It normally only let's me think I have one error. #DBAProblems
Replace "throw paper to toilet" w/ "use 40 LEFT OUTER JOINs in a query" #DBAproblems #Sochi2014 #SQL
On-call during vacation, they say? #lego #programmingproblems #dbaproblems #ithumor #oncall #computerscience #databasehumor

Off topic but this is on living life fully, & I just got blood that makes me feel alive #DBAProblems #fireworkpeople

When your supposedly 30-minute meeting with your manager turned into a 1 1/2 hour meeting instead. #dbaproblems #programmingproblems

When a P1 database issue comes up and the whole team comes over and looks at EVERYTHING you do on screen with the hopes of you fixing it with magic. #dbaproblems #dba #lego #itproblems #programmingproblems #database #computerscience #ithumor

When you already made plans for the weekend and work unexpectedly requires you to be in the office 😂 #dbaproblems

🔍 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞𝐬? Learn how to tackle the 6 most common problems and optimize your system for peak efficiency! 🚀 #databaseperformanceissues #dbperformanceissues #dbaproblems tinyurl.com/3uek9sw9

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